If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
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