Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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