Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize