Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
