What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
