He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
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