You're so nebulous sometimes
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
