Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into? http://tfl.nu/n657
  Replies (32) Good night (1002) Bad night (4016)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment. http://tfl.nu/y50b
  Replies (16) Good night (2385) Bad night (2459)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Intervention is following me on twitter.

  (440): View more from Ohio

  wow.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): Intervention is following me on twitter. (440): wow. http://tfl.nu/4vti
  Replies (14) Good night (5398) Bad night (1579)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy??? http://tfl.nu/4rkp
  Replies (30) Good night (841) Bad night (4991)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (573): On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower. http://tfl.nu/pdns
  Replies (3) Good night (2162) Bad night (903)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (608): We should search craigslist for porches to sublet. http://tfl.nu/mpxg
  Replies (2) Good night (1813) Bad night (824)
• Favorite

  (229): View more from Georgia

  No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (229): No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry http://tfl.nu/1p4e
  Replies (6) Good night (2688) Bad night (1007)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard. http://tfl.nu/xcqc
  Replies (4) Good night (1928) Bad night (616)
• Favorite

  (239): View more from Florida

  I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (239): I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you! http://tfl.nu/6j2k
  Replies (4) Good night (629) Bad night (2886)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (250): your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party http://tfl.nu/pnv8
  Replies (2) Good night (1029) Bad night (472)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (901): apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing. http://tfl.nu/cw14
  Replies (3) Good night (733) Bad night (587)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too http://tfl.nu/4cqb
  Replies (1) Good night (320) Bad night (515)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now http://tfl.nu/gmmk
  Replies (5) Good night (657) Bad night (365)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake http://tfl.nu/zcp7
  Replies (0) Good night (522) Bad night (329)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (207): I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING http://tfl.nu/pi9e
  Replies (0) Good night (441) Bad night (156)

Randomize