You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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