he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
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