The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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