whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
