walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
