Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
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