Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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