I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
So vagazzling was a success
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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