Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
