What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
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