I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
it wasn't lemon gatorade
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
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