I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.