His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.