it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
