my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She swung at the pinata with crutches
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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