1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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