I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
