We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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