He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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