Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
