highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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