ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
