she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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