okay pat passed out under dana's car
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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