I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize
