I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
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This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
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My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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