I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Randomize
