i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
