Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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