either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
This house was built for laser tag.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize
