im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
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my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
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At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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