that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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