You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
