just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
now i know why i became what i already was.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Randomize