"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
just found out that she named her cat after me.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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