VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
