Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
