she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
3pm strippers are depressing
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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