You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Randomize
