i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
third nipple confirmed
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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