At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Randomize
