I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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