I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
She announced her abortion via fbk
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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